Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise

You know that moment when you hear the "click" of a roller coaster harness and the "click-clack" of the tracks as you start to move? The feeling of holy shit sinks in and you instantly want to scream and get off but know there is no turning back. That is the feeling that overcame both Nick and me when we left our nurses class on Monday, a huge lump in our throat and a $7,965 bill. Do we regret our choice? Absolutely not. Do I question if we should have waited longer for the other treatments? Yeah, I did for a little bit. I felt bad that we were putting ourselves into this enormous debt for something that does not even have a 100% chance of success. However, my nose would be growing quicker than Pinnochio if I said I was not more excited about this than anything else in my entire life.

The appointment was really informative. We learned how to mix the three different injections that I will be taking, starting May 19th. They could not tell us much in regards to a timeline because it is all dependent on how my body reacts to the injections. Typically, you do them for 8-12 days, with 10 days being the average. It is always so interesting to learn more about this process and the amazing things science can do. We got a calendar for all of the dates that could be figured out, and information on each procedure and event. It was A LOT to take in. Tuesday will be my last day on the birth control, and Saturday will be the first injection.

My very first monitoring visit, to check how the injections are working, will be Wednesday, May 23. That is probably the day that we will get a better idea of dates, and really be able to narrow down our timeline! If all is well in the world, they have us pregnant (embryo transfer day) somewhere between June 2 - June 6 and pregnancy test date of FATHER'S DAY! There is always a chance that I will develop too many eggs and they will not do a fresh embryo transfer and I will have to wait until the following month to do a frozen one. That is the real only hiccup in the road in regards to not being able to do the June transfer. From that point on, I am still doing injections. If I do end up pregnant I will have to continue 10 weeks of progesterone injections in my bum. As of right now we only have 3 concrete dates; Monday for a saline ultrasound and mock transfer, Saturday to start injections and the following Wednesday for my first monitoring visit. Everything else will be planned out with only a couple to a few days notice. Thankfully, both of our jobs are completely on board and not only understand but fully support us. This means we could be expecting Baby D to start growing in just three and a half weeks!

I have learned this little saying in the IVF world, pregnant until proven otherwise. I honestly did not pay much mind to it until I realized what it meant. The day of the embryo transfer, they are putting our baby inside of me. I will be pregnant. I will be carrying an embryo and all I have to do it pray it sticks. They call it pregnant until proven otherwise because technically, you are. Of course, there are things that could go wrong, and the baby could fade, but for those two weeks that I wait to take a pregnancy test I will be pregnant. I. Will. Be. Pregnant.

Our appointments are going to be back to back, and far away. The nurses class was so early in the morning that we decided to make a weekend out of it and went to the NC Zoo for the first time. We spend so much time in Raleigh that we now have our "spots" for after our appointments. It has become a part of our life.

This thing that comes so easy to some people, this free and beautiful product of love is something that we have to literally schedule time for. It still blows my mind. But, the more and more I think about it and prepare for it, the more beautiful our own story seems. Nick and I are doing well, and I want people to really know that. I have more sad days than he does, and I have more of them than I would like, but we are hanging in there. We love the messages and post, the comments of love and support, it helps us so much knowing we have so many people who are there for us. Please never hesitate to reach out to us with questions about all of this, what it means or why we are doing it. My papa told me once, "you can't get to Rome unless you use your tongue" if you want to know then just ask. We are so open about this all.

That is really it Team D. Right now we are just following directions and getting things prepared.

Keep praying Team D.

xoxo, ALD

Baby D IVF ttd: $10,562.38

Consultation: $124

Nurses Class & Procedure - $7,965

Medications - $1,624.38

Saline Ultrasound - $849

For those who have asked... Tricare does not cover any of the IVF expenses. I was lucky enough to get the antibiotic I have to take before the transfer, the pain meds and nausea meds for after the egg retrieval, and the baby aspirin, at my pharmacy which is covered. However, the $10,000 we have spent so far is out of pocket and is a little more than half of what we will end up spending. At the end of every appointment, we have to pay the entirety of the bill.